Darren's blog
The NHB Misunderstanding on Meetfighters
When I first joined Meetfighters, I was honestly excited. The whole idea of finding people who were into fighting sounded great. I’ve always been into real, full-contact fights—where punches land, grappling gets rough, and both guys walk away knowing they were in an actual fight.
Naturally, when setting up my profile and browsing others, I looked for the “NHB” (No Holds Barred) tag. To me, NHB meant exactly that—no holds barred, real fighting, minimal rules, and both guys giving it their all. I thought, “Finally, here’s where I’ll find people who actually get what I’m looking for.”
But yeah… it didn’t exactly turn out that way.
Almost every time I reached out to someone with NHB listed, the conversation started with a bit of hope... and then slowly crashed and burned. I’d bring up striking or mention something like ground and pound, and suddenly the mood would shift. Some would reply with stuff like, “Oh, you mean real punching? I thought NHB was just rough wrestling.” Others would backpedal with things like, “Yeah I’m into NHB but… no face shots, no body shots, no hard slams… actually let’s keep it light.”
There were even times I felt like I had to double-check if we were talking about the same sport at all. Some guys clearly thought NHB just meant “let’s roll around with fewer scripted moves” or “fantasy roughhousing”. Others were mixing it up with pro wrestling vibes, complete with roleplay scenarios that had nothing to do with actual fighting.
At first, I was honestly a bit annoyed. It felt like every time I thought I’d found someone who was into the same thing, it would turn out they were using the label for something completely different. But after a while, I started to get it...
It’s not really anyone’s fault. It’s just that people interpret “NHB” differently on this platform. For some, it’s a fantasy category. For others, it’s just another way of saying “let’s wrestle with no strict rules.” And then there’s people like me, who see it as real fighting—striking and grappling, full contact, no playing around.
Now, whenever I chat with someone, I’ve gotten into the habit of just laying it out early. I explain what I mean by NHB and check if we’re on the same page. It’s saved me a lot of back and forth.
At the end of the day, I still think Meetfighters is a cool space with a lot of variety. People come here for different reasons, and that’s fair. But yeah… if you’re a real fighter like me looking for full-contact, expect to do some filtering… and maybe a bit of explaining along the way.
Just sharing my experience in case anyone else out there’s going through the same thing.
gymrat (43)
7/01/2025 3:20 PMLOL I always look and say "boy, a bunch of tough dudes, I'm a wimp". Survey says.....no.
No. Holds. Barred. Seems simple. (my two cents literally also seems dangerous, I've studies a little Jeet Kune Do and you really dont want NHB)
litewt78 (103)
7/01/2025 3:22 PMThere's always a degree of intensity across every category label here. Even stuff like "want sex" doesn't always mean sex for some people. There are even profiles that say "Straight" orientation but they are looking for erotic man on man action. Just take the profile categories with a grain of salt.
I suggest checking the recommendations (if any), and following up with their past opponent(s) to gauge a sense of what to expect.. or at least what they are capable of.
michguy (6)
7/01/2025 9:53 PM(In reply to this)
That all seems like a lot more work than just asking him directly.
Crushnthud (0 )
7/01/2025 4:46 PMI think you're totally correct. I actually had to check my listings, and I do have NHB listed. Which is actually outside what I can participate in.
I cannot be all busted up. Also prior to MF, I had run into one guy that on the public meeting he expressed that he was going to break my nose and rupture my testicles with his kicks and smash my windpipe and I better do it "to him first" cuz it was going to happen to me. I think he also said something about beating both of my eyes swollen shut. So... that is outside what I want.
Submission, is not probably not enough to describe my thing either. Wrestling with punches is closer.
Once we've gauged each other, I'm good with starting from standing and punching and kicking at moderate/discomfort sparring power. I've discovered that during the clench against the wall I like to trade those low power "thuddy" knees to the torso. The ones that make that good meaty thud, and you realize you've really got stop him from doing that more.
I like the all out grappling and some slow meaty punches being traded, a measured knee, even a kick. I usually specify no strikes to the groin, neck or face.
It is a hard balance to get that measure. I mean I want to feel like I had that risky feeling of aggressive struggle, but need to be able to speak at a conference the next day (covered in a suit).
So it is a very hard balance as I seem to run into people with interests and aggression more in veiled erotic roles, and the "all-out" bare knuckle face bashers. If the roll and tug gang are at 1 on the scale "all out" bare knuckle gang are at 10, I'd say I'm at like a 7, maybe a little more once we've sync'd up better.
So is my NHB a good descriptor? Probably not the best. I do have better descriptors in my profile of what I'm looking for though.
After reading your post I almost took the NHB tag down but I've decided to leave it for now. I mean, I've got a wide range of acceptable rules from straight sub wrestling to what I've described above. I think some NHB'ers are likely similar in having a range and will come across my profile this way too.
I talked to one guy in chat with almost identical interests to me, and he called his ideal style "Seniors MMA", I thought it was both funny and but a good description.
Maybe we need a tag below the NHB level, something like "Lots of rules MMA", or "Limited NHB", or something else. I don't feel like those are good tags for what some of us want which is VERY competitive wrestling/grappling with some striking, but safe and sane while seeking the "competitive feeling" and risk.
I have decided that for the time being, I'm going to leave my NHB tag up for now... Good hunting and safe travels everyone!
LancsBoxer (19 )
7/02/2025 2:23 AM(In reply to this)
"It is a hard balance to get that measure. I mean I want to feel like I had that risky feeling of aggressive struggle, but need to be able to speak at a conference the next day (covered in a suit)."
I really like this description & is generally where I sit with my meets.
Perfect Gentleman (5)
7/01/2025 5:37 PMI think the confusion is caused by the fact that the term in general doesn't have a consistent meaning. It's original meaning is basically catch wrestling, which still wouldn't include striking, and once you include striking, it's basically just MMA.
BamaJDon41 (8 )
7/01/2025 8:39 PMNo "Holds" Barred. Holds refers to wrestling. Fist fighting is what you're looking for.
Plymwrestle (3)
7/01/2025 11:10 PMEveryone is on the same page here. It's the same old story on this site. Perhaps some more detail on the profiles would help. I personally don't interpret nhb as having the shit kicked out of me. Just competitive with reasonable aggression...
KOFistBoxer (2)
7/02/2025 9:00 PMYeah this has been a constant misunderstanding problem for hundreds of people since the site began. If you actually hover over the NHB icon in profiles it specifically says it means MMA and includes striking (there is no limit to "body only" mentioned), but people read that about as often as they read profiles.
It's clear for a lot of people on the site (perhaps a firm majority) they THINK it means fake, fantasy "pro-wrestling", but pretending it's tough and rough.... or that it just means whatever they want it to mean or think it should mean. Like it's that Hulk Hogan movie from the 1980s where they pretend pro-wrestling is real.
By the definition AS OFFICIALLY LISTED on this site, it would include getting punched in face, but guys who are hesitant or scared to do that that will insist it doesn't... even though I could repeat was it says verbatim, they will pretend it says what they want it to. Since there is no icon for mma/pankration specifically this causes a lot of confusion.... especially since MMA is an official, globally recognized professional sport... and "NHB wrestling" isn't at all. It is closer to fantasy and as some say there is no set definition.
Of course the super quick and easy way to fix all these problems for everyone would just be to either change the name OR make a totally new separate icon for MMA (and/or no rules fights)... but I have suggested this to those that run the site in the past (and I am sure I am not the only one)... but any time I make any simple, common sense suggestion (or even report bad behavior) I typically just get a long, jargon-filled answer basically saying they won't lift a finger to do anything and we should just be happy with what we have.
Either way there is a major, clear and notable difference between people who cross train in multiple real combat sports, that include grappling AND full body striking..... and those who are into a fantasy style that involves pretending it's real and hard-core. Mixing them in one category is super confusing.
If anything there should be completely different markers for 1) Wrestling with body punching only, 2) Standard MMA, 3) Pankration/no rules fighting, 4) Gut punching (so people who won't do face shots stop marking boxing when it's not boxing), and I guess maybe 5) NHB Wrestling (if not scrap it completely since nobody seems to know what it entails and it's not a real official sport in any notable capacity). It is odd that something like "pool wrestling" is listed, but MMA is not.
So I totally agree, you're absolutely right, and this would help our hundreds of people... but don't hold your breath expecting a change. Best of luck finding what you are looking for.
Facepuncher (2)
7/02/2025 9:30 PM(In reply to this)
You summed up my thoughts pretty well with this post!
PBWstillpunching (3)
7/03/2025 1:01 AMI find confusion among all of the types of fighting. It's very frustrating for me in that I'm looking for guys interested in boxing, so I will do specific searches on guys into boxing and will get a list of guys with such interests, but after talking to them over half of them are not into actual boxing. It is misleading in a sense when you setup your profile and check the boxes, but it asks your INTERESTS so some guys may be interested in boxing, but wouldn't actually be up for boxing. It would be better if the profile setup asked you what sports would you actually participate in, this would give everyone a better idea up front as to who is interested in what.
wrestletapout (0)
7/03/2025 1:10 AMAm facing the same when it comes to the term submission wrestling...
Fighter UK (24)
7/03/2025 9:19 AMI feel the same. You're totally right
I wish people would not list NHB on their profile when all they want is a roll about
NHB is for guys who want a real fight without fewer boundaries
wrestle46 (8)
7/03/2025 11:43 AMIt's all up to interpretation, I have had situations myself when I have wanted a rough wrestle and even with some punching and some guys back away. It's always a good thing to check with the other wrestler so your on the same page. If he is not what you want to wrestle move on. It's hard when there are not many wrestlers that want the same thing.
bigchicago (65)
7/05/2025 4:50 AMI’ve always viewed it as more of an attitude as those tags are wrestling styles, not a list of rules. NHB doesn’t mean an anything goes fight, it’s more the idea of being very rough with few limits.